Monday, March 15, 2010 10:09 AM

End of sufferings, to a better life - R.I.P. Uncle Goh

He fought a battle with the evil cancer cells. The last time I saw him was the week before CNY. I went to 拜年 and he returned my mandarin oranges with an ang pow. He was still laughing and joking with me, but I could see his uneasiness when his bags were leaking. He felt the pain of his wound being "eaten" up by the gastric juice, but he endured.

He's my buddy's dad. A friendly man with eccentric temper. He's nice despite all the teasing I've "suffered" these years, but I know he was just teasing and he tease me because he is comfortable with me. I saw him for the first time after he was admitted into the hospital and discovered to have stomach cancer.

Although he seems alright and joking to me every time I pay him a visit, like most cancer patients, he also can be suicidal. He had negative thoughts and told them to my buddy, but there's nothing she could do, other than to lecture him or to feel pressured herself.

Having a cancer patient in the family is very hard for the family themselves. High medical bills, continuous mental stress, physical fatigue (by travel to and fro to visit them and to do whatever they can to make the patient feel better) and many more contributions that a normal outsider like me could not feel or understand.

When he was still around, I thought the least I could do was to ensure him that his daughter has friends, and not just friends, but friends that she can depend on during her bad times and when she needed help, like then.

I feel sad whenever I see my buddy so tired and weary. Though she is still cheery when she's out with us and can joke and play around with us, but the weariness that was stuck on her face is visible. Dark eye circles, puffy eyes, skinnier body were what we saw on her. What can I do to make her feel better at this period was what that often pass through my mind. Other than hanging out with her when she's able to, I can't think of any other things to help.

Now that he's gone, it's not say a bad thing either. Now, he's away from the sufferings and pain. Now the family is finally at ease. Now they had at least spent the last few hours of his life by his side.

I hope he's up there, feeling a lot better. No pain, no worries, no more sufferings, but blessings to his family and looking after them from up above. The family is doing well with his passing away and I reckon they will be even stronger after he's gone. They will.

May strength be with them.

Life is like that. It's no easy task. It needs to be built, be understood, delicately handled, effort put in, monitored, maintained, backuped and properly disposed. It is almost like anything that we are using right now. All these make us learn to be a better person for ourselves and others. If any of these steps were to be missed out, things will go wrong and it will be hard to make things right again.

If now, you are not of good terms with your loves, try talking to them again and communicate. If you are alright with your loves, make the relationship even better. If you are always looking out and taking good care of them, do continue that way. We all need someone to be a whole, same goes to everyone. Don't be stingy with your love and praises. Praising someone is easy, but how you take other people's praises is hard.

Learn to accept, digest and reciprocate.

Labels: buddy, life, personal, thoughts